Dear Peanut,

As you turned, officially, 6-week-old today, I want to share with you a photo of the medical team who did our stat CS operation last November 2, 2017.

When we were pregnant, we received A LOT of advice—both solicited and unsolicited. We listened to most of them but there were also some we dismissed almost immediately.

Back in Malaysia, I remember how I Google-d the shit out of everything the moment we found out about you. We didn’t know a thing. So we wanted to be prepared for our first prenatal checkup.

I remember how I would have a long list of questions for our first OB-GYN, Dra.AZ, and how she would often find my “praning” questions funny. She was very patient with me and we liked her. But I also felt that since she’s Malaysian and we’re Filipinos, there was this sense of “disconnection” because she couldn’t relate to the things we were concerned about—like if I could color my hair during my pregnancy.

So that led me to Google a lot, instead, and ask my “mommy friends.”

When we went back to Manila and met our Filipino OB-GYN for the first time, I was also prepared with a list of questions. Dra.JMF answered them all but I sensed that she saw through my “ka-praningan” and found my real problem. I research a lot that I often end up scaring myself to the point of stressing myself out. And you know what, she gave me one of the best advice we were given: Stop reading mommy blog and forums. If you have questions, ask your doctor.

As a writer, researching is part of what I do, and probably who I am. When Dra.JMF pointed out my problem, I realized that I was depriving myself of the joys of pregnancy because of my fears. Mommy blogs, forums, and many related websites tend to contradict one another that you can get stuck in the middle—paralyzed and more confused than ever. What you need to do is to find good doctors and trust them.

I’d like to dedicate this blog post to the amazing doctors who took care of us when we gave birth to you. It was such an amazing experience! :) And we will forever be grateful for the generosity they extended to us.

XOXO,

Update (as of March 29, 2018): Changed my codename from Queen Bitch (QB) to Tiger Mom (TM).