Dear Peanut,

For someone who had never been admitted to a hospital before (thank God!), being told that you’re about to undergo an operation should have been scary.

But all I felt that time was excitement because it meant I would get to see you very, very soon!

The epidural probably helped as well. Dr.VRO explained to me that I would be given an epidural for the C-section and I wouldn’t feel anything. She assured me that it would be painless and it was.

I remember clearly that some sort of FM radio station (or maybe it was a Spotify playlist) was playing in the background when they wheeled me into the delivery room. I recognized Dr.ANC immediately when I arrived. And then there’s Dr.JMF in her orange suit who asked me if I know Dr.ANC and I said yes, I met him at her clinic a few weeks ago and introduced myself.

I felt another welcoming shiver down my spine (the epidural) before the operation started. I remember clearly that Dr.VRO was holding my head the entire time. I was strapped down on the operating bed but I could feel my arms shivering, not from the cold. The shivers were involuntary movements as a result of the anesthesia. They gave me a warming blanket, even though I wasn’t really cold, it sort of helped.

I didn’t watch any C-section YouTube videos prior to giving birth. Okay, so I watched only one birthing video—a normal, vaginal delivery, but nothing about C-section.

I like to research but not researching about C-section was probably the best thing I did. I had no nightmarish visuals to scare me. It happened so fast.

I remember Dr.JMF and Dr.ANC chatting with the medical team throughout the operation. Every now and then, they would talk to me and I would respond as if my stomach wasn’t open.

If I wasn’t the one being operated on, it was almost as if everyone was just having coffee and scones at a coffee shop. The mood was just so light that Dr.ANC even brought up the Advil thing (that’s for another entry) and I even laughed at my #pregnancybrain moment. I don’t think the Advil joke would die down, hahaha.

I also remember that Dr.ANC commented on how strong my muscles were contracting and Dr.JMF said that your father and I were weightlifters. Hurray for fitness, but my muscle tone was one of the reasons why you wouldn’t go down in the first time and why the Evening Primrose Oil didn’t work on me.

Soon, Dr.JMF gave the go signal for your father to enter the delivery room and then we heard you cry for the first time. “May baby na kayo,” I remember Dr.JMF said.


After what felt like half a minute, they brought you to my face and I saw you for the first time. The first thing I noticed was your full head of hair! Anak ka nga ng tatay mo, hehe.



My arms were shaking heavily from the anesthesia. SC thought the table was shaking and not me. After a few more minutes of listening in to the chika in the delivery room, they told me it was over.

They wheeled me into the delivery room where I spent 2-3 hooked up on machines. Every now and then, a lactation nurse would visit and help you try to latch on me (the first one was in the delivery room).

Unang Yakap. :) They're teaching us the proper way to latch.

After 3 hours, they wheeled me to our room where your #LolaMommy, #LolaMama, #LoloDaddy, and SC were waiting. Soon, your AuntieAnne and AuntieDing would arrive with flowers, and UncleP would call from his internship.



It would be a few hours before you would be roomed-in with me. But wow, a mother, a father, and a son were born on November 2, 2017 at exactly 4:55pm.

[QB] My Birthing Story Part 1
[QB] My Birthing Story Part 2

XOXO,

Update (as of March 29, 2018): Changed my codename from Queen Bitch (QB) to Tiger Mom (TM).