Dear Peanut: mixed feeding

"I gave birth 11 months ago. I have prepared myself for an exclusive breastfeeding journey, read all the books, joined most of the breastfeeding groups here on Facebook, and took all the galactogogues even before giving birth.

Hardcore breastfeeding mommy ako kumbaga. Then came my delivery, it was not an easy normal delivery. I stayed 14 hours, did Unang Yakap and early latching.

At first, I thought I was producing less, so unli-latch talaga kami sa hospital. Pati hanggang paguwi. Second night, I observed LO having bouts of inconsolable cries. I thought it was just kabag as my mom says. Third night, ganoon pa din. No sleep at all. Zombie mode. Unli-latch pa din. I even increased my malunggay capsule dose. Malunggay to all my meals. I even have M2, but none of them worked.

It was day 4 of my son when I noticed he became yellowish. And noticed yellow to orange stains on his diaper. I knew there was something wrong. It was also his 1st checkup.

My ever supportive Pedia says he didn't gain weight, as losing weight the first week is normal but to a certain measure only. He was crying most of the time, if not sleeping while latching.

I know mali talaga, siguro, nakakatulog na lang siya kasi napagod na siya kaka-latch, and wala pa ding milk. I tried pumping, patak lang. I know hindi basehan ang pumping to gauge milk...pero patak? Grabe lang. Then Pedia recommended observing if he's giving me enough wet diapers and mawala jaundice and mag gain ng weight kasi nga pinupush ko ang breastfeeding.

Pero come to think of it, my baby is too fragile to be dehydrated that much. It was also the day I started formula. I cried when I fed him a bottle. I really cried. Parang postpartum depression crying ganoon. Kasi nga I felt too bad, na its a failure.

Parang after feeding parang milagro, he can sleep soundly, nawala ang crying inconsolably, unti-unti nawala ang paninilaw.

Pero siyempre, I didn't give up my breastmilk. And I realized, hey, I'm not a bad mom. I feed my baby. Regardless if it's formula or breast milk.

As of today. He is 11 months old, he can consume about 15 oz of formula, while unli-latch pa din sa akin. He is gaining weight and super bibo baby. We are practicing Tamang Kain. And LO is kind of eating na din. Yehey!

At first, I pray to breastfeed him for at least 1 week, para sa colostrum, kahit colostrum lang kako para healthy baby ko. At 1-week nag-stabilize supply ko, dumami ang milk, so sabi ko, please hanggang 6 weeks, just before he has his vaccine, para healthy pa rin siya. Then hanggang 3 months po sana madami pa milk ko tapos ok na...hanggang sa 6 months po tapos mag solids na si LO, pero since I am still milking, sige na.. hanggang mag self-wean na lang si LO. I will still continue our mixed feeding journey...until the last drop.

Fed is best. Again, motherhood is not just milk.

~Aidelenn Wong-Bajandi

Founder of Mixed Feeding Moms PH

This entry was submitted by Kalisha Kring as part of an online promo for the Mixed Feeding Moms PH.

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1st Time Mom
Baby Boy
2 Months old
Emergency CS

"I gave birth 2 months ago and my son's birthweight was 2.5kg. Pasang-awa ang timbang niya but I told myself na 'babawiin namin ni baby ang timbang niya via EBF."

Unang Yakap was done right away so ang saya-saya ko kasi nasimulan na agad ang breastfeeding journey namin.

I ate a lot of galactagogues and drank A LOT of fluids every day. I also had a weekly lactation consultation and massage with a Lactation Counselor for 3 consecutive weeks. I took Moringga 3 times a day together with GI Norm (domperidone). But despite all these efforts, my baby still cries inconsolably.

Awang-awa ako sa kanya na every time na maglalatch siya eh iiyak siya out of frustration then makakatulog na siya dahil napagod na siya sa pag-latch at pag-iyak. Akala ko dati kaya siya nakakatulog dahil nabusog na siya---maling akala.

So days went by na ganoon kami at napapansin namin ng family ko na parang pumapayat si LO pero in denial ako kahit pa nakikita na ng mga mata ko ang visible bones niya.

In denial kasi ang taas ng faith ko sa benefits ng breastfeeding and for me, how can an EBF go wrong?My mom suggested na magstart na kami ng formula kasi mukhang kulang ang gatas ko but I didn't listen and still pushed for EBF.

And then the pedia check-up happened.

From his birthweight of 2.5kg then 2.1kg (6 days after birth) ay bumagsak siya sa 1.8kg (24 days old)! Iyak ako sa loob ng clinic! What have i done to my son??!! All I want is to give my son the BEST pero bakit ganito??

Nanganib ang buhay ng anak ko dahil sa kagustuhan kong i-EBF siya! Sa timbang niyang 1.8kg ay literal na buto't balat siya. Sobrang nakakaawa at nakakatakot.

My 1st pedia prescribed formula milk para makahabol kami sa timbang ni baby. Eventually, lumipat kami to a new pedia at nakukulangan siya sa basta formula lang kaya she prescribed vitamins and I'm glad that we have a new pedia na mas tutok sa baby ko. Thanks, doc!

From July 1 na 1.8kg naging 2.8kg (July 20) na si baby. He gained 1 kg in just 19 days! Thank, God! Malayo pa kami sa average weight ni baby para sa edad niya but I'm glad beccause we are gaining weight and we are even surpassing the ideal 30g weight gain per day. Now, double chin na siya, full cheeks na, sleeping well na, and with adequate urine output and BM. We also noticed happier na ang disposition niya now, unlike dati na lagi siyang umiiyak.

I talked to my lactation counselor, we figured out the reason kung bakit under-supplier ako despite EVERYTHING that we did. The reason was I had a breast excisional biopsy sa both breasts 7 years ago and malaki ang possibility na may mga damaged milk ducts ako.

It was heartbreaking to know the fact na di ko pala talaga maa-achieve ang EBF sa anak ko kahit anong gawin ko. Buti na lang at naimbento ang formula milk kaya may pantustos ako sa nutritional needs ni LO dahil nga under supplier ako. Pero kahit under supplier ako I am still blessed kasi may BM ako kahit papaano and I am giving my LO the best BM that my body can offer.

Photos by Zhy Permejo Guinto

EBF is ideal (my heart is yearning for it even until now) but don't push for
it kung talagang di kaya lalo na kung manganganib na ang buhay ng baby mo. Being a good mother doesn't solely depends on how you feed your baby. Being a good mother is being able to decide for the BEST interest of your child.

Therefore, I must say that Fed is Best <3

~ Zhy Permejo Guinto
This entry was submitted by Kalisha Kring as part of an online promo for the Mixed Feeding Moms PH.

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Hello there!

My own breastfeeding journey (read it here, here, and here) has made me a strong advocate of Mixed Feeding. When Smart Parenting published an edited version of my original blog (read it here) on their website, it made me realize that there are so many mothers out there who give their babies BOTH breast milk and formula milk.

I launched the new series Mixed Feelings Mixed Feedings #MFMF on the #DearPeanut Blog because I wanted to help fellow mixed feeding mothers share their own stories about the struggles and triumphs, fears and hopes, pride and disappointments about the feeding process, particularly how they decided to mix feed their babies and their feelings about it.

The goal is to provide a venue where fellow moms can share their feeding stories - whether it's breastfeeding, bottlefeeding, formula feeding, and/or mixed feeding. The goal is to help spread love and support because as parents, we all want the best for our kids, right?

The real pressures to exclusively breastfeed (direct latch, no bottle feeding breastmilk) has become so EXTRA that many people now think feeding your baby formula milk is synonymous with giving poison.

Mothers shouldn't be made to feel they're committing a crime or an injustice if they give their babies formula milk. This is just utterly wrong. Don’t we all want the best for our babies? I think there’s an urgent need for stronger support for women who formula feed but still want to give breastmilk for as long as they can.

If you have stories and/or lessons to share, please see the mechanics below on how to join.

1. Send you story to me via email (kceustaquio@gmail.com) or Facebook Messenger (Kath C. Eustaquio-Derla or Author Kath C. Eustaquio-Derla)
2. Your story should be at least 300 words and written in English. Taglish is acceptable, but the entry should be written mostly in English.
3. Please attach at least 3 photos to accompany your story. Maximum of 5 photos per entry.
4. Don’t worry about grammar. Our editors will review and edit your story before we publish them online.
5. All approved stories will be published on the #DearPeanut blog and shared on Facebook.

What are you waiting for? Share your #MixedFeelingMixedFeeding #MFMF stories today.

SUBMISSIONS

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Dear Peanut,

Let me explain to you my beef with exclusively breastfeeding hardcores.

When you left NICU, we’ve seen the big changes almost immediately. The physiological jaundice is gone. You don’t look like turmeric chicken anymore. Your skin now has a healthy tocino glow. You also seemed less irritated. You appeared well-fed and well-rested. A happy, healthy, baby boy!

We were advised na paarawan ka at 6am for the next few days and as much as we can. We also got your feeding schedule from NICU and was taught how to dropper feed you. So that’s what we did when we got home.

Since you couldn’t get my milk out yet, we just continued your formula feeding schedule. My breasts became so engorged that we had to call Ate Zsa Zsa to the rescue. She’s one of the midwives who attended to us at TMC. Apart from lactation massages, she also teaches TMC patients how to bathe a newborn.

She came to our home and worked on my super engorged jugs while expressing milk. Miracle of all miracles! She was able to express 40ml of breastmilk in that one session alone. Actually, it was science, not a miracle, but it felt like the latter because it was the first time I’ve seen my jugs let out colostrum by the ml.

For one whole hour, she milked me like the postpartum cow that I was while your father attended to your needs (changing your diapers, soothing your cries, and dropper-feeding the milk that we just expressed).

After Ate Zsa Zsa left, I was able to hand express 30ml more!

Ate Zsa Zsa kept on saying that I have very high pain tolerance because normally, most women would be crying right then and there because of the painful sensation. Hand expressing was painful but even if I gave birth to you through painless CS, I experienced labor pain, and I tapped out and asked for an epidural at 6cm (or was it 5cm?)

In the past weeks, we also tried nearly all of the tricks and tips on how to increase milk supply. Nalulunod na ako sa sabaw at napupurga na ako sa malunggay. I also ordered those expensive (but worth it) lactation treats and take malunggay capsule twice a day. I do hand expressions, direct latching (but still getting the same results), and boob massages.

Lactation cookies and treats from Mommy Treats!

Finally, when your UncleP saw how you latch on, he said there are babies na hindi marunong mag-latch ng tama sa umpisa. But he advised to just continue and those short latching and sucking still help. Until finally, we bought that Pigeon Nipple Shield and it totally changed the game!

Pigeon Nipple Shield - expensive but worth it!

I told you that I won’t do product reviews but when I do find a product that I really, really like, I’ll tell you about it. A nipple shield is like an artificial nipple you place on your natural nipple to create that “protruded” shape babies can latch onto properly.

It’s like a condom for your nipple and it works like magic! On the first try, you were able to direct latch and breastfeed on my left breast for 15 whole minutes! Again, exclusively breastfeeding hardcores would probably say, “Artificial nipple pa din yan. You should do direct latching only because…blah blah blah blah…” or “Naku, dapat hindi mo ginawa yan, mako-confuse yung baby mo sa nipples…mali yan...blah blah blah…”

Again, back off.

It probably makes you wonder bakit ako galit na galit sa mga hardcores, here’s why:

The pressure to exclusively breastfeed (as in direct latch, no bottle feeding breastmilk) has become so EXTRA that many people now think feeding your baby formula milk is synonymous with giving poison.

I mean, I’ve joined several mommy groups and breastfeeding groups on Facebook. I’ve read the comments and questions and I couldn’t help but do an eye roll every time I see a comment from those who keep pushing direct latching and exclusive breastfeeding as if they’ve seen the concerned person’s issues firsthand.

Take this for instance: One of the “counselors” I talked to from an exclusive breastfeeding group kept on telling me that direct latching your baby is the only sure way to increase your milk supply. She's right but what if you're having problems with direct latching in the first place at hindi ka naman nagkukulang?

Sure, she shared a lot of tips and comforting words but when I told her the story about how we supplemented with milk formula when we were at NICU, she made me feel like I did a great injustice to my baby that she even asked for the name of the hospital and the pediatrician who advised it. I was like, "Wow, do you have the power to fire the doctor or shut down the hospital? Kung makatanong ka, wagas eh."

I’m like, why? Crime na ba ngayon ang magbigay ng formula milk? Come on, formula milk is a suitable option if breast milk is not available.

Here’s another example. A lactation consultant sent me an SMS asking if I am exclusively breastfeeding. She also asked how many feedings I give, for how long the baby breastfeeds, how many wet diapers, etc.

I wasn’t exclusively breastfeeding and I double guessed if I should even reply. But I did, and I explained all about the need to supplement with formula at the hospital. I gave a very detailed response. And you know what? The response I got was, “Okay ma’am. Thank you, God bless.”

Nagdilim yung panginin ko, I swear!

I was actually expecting to be told to still try direct latching and breastfeeding. That would have been a warm response. The best response would be an encouraging reminder that it’s okay to supplement with formula if breast milk isn’t available at the moment and while I’m still building up my supply.

The best response would have been a reminder that I’m doing the best I can as a first-time mother and that I shouldn’t feel guilty at all. The best response would have been an invitation to call them in case I need to talk to a lactation therapist (even if I need to pay a professional fee) and that their doors are open for me and my baby anytime.

But no…

That response felt like a door slam to my face. Somehow, whenever I see messages ending with the proverbial “God bless”, it reads like “Okay, end of conversation, you don’t need to reply anymore. Bye."

It was very disappointing. I felt like when they find out that mothers don’t exclusively breastfeed, they kick them aside by not offering comforting words that we’re doing the best we can, as they surely would to those who exclusive breastfeed.

And that practice, that pressure has made breastfeeding in general even more difficult and not fun at all for those who are trying their best despite the real issues they don’t post in those breastfeeding posters and videos.

In my first book, Before I Do, I wrote about how annoying it has become that even your neighbor’s relative can just nonchalantly ask why you’re still single or when you’re getting married (if you are in a relationship). And when you’re married, your neighbor’s relative can also nonchalantly ask why you still don’t have kids.

I mean, these used to be private questions that only people you know can ask you. Today, kahit yung nagtitinda ng taho sa kabilang kanto puwede ka tanungin kung bakit ka pa rin single. And it’s not because they always mean well.

Take exclusive breastfeeding for instance. What if the person you asked has a baby with serious latch-on issues (like a physical defect or something?)What if the person you asked previously had a breast removal surgery because of cancer? What if the person you asked has a disease that prevents her from breastfeeding? What if you continuously ask women why they don’t breastfeed and you insist that they do without even knowing if they have serious problems that no counseling can solve?

And it sucks that the focus on exclusive breastfeeding have made women feel that they’re committing a crime whenever they buy formula milk at the stores. You’d see the stares, you’d somehow feel the whispers, and you’d feel the judgment. And maybe that’s why many mothers, especially first-time moms, don’t post on social media that they’re supplementing their breast milk with formula milk if they need to “top up.”

Mothers shouldn't be made to feel they're committing a crime or an injustice if they give their babies formula milk.

For me, at least, it's similar to choosing between using disposable diapers and cloth diapers. Cloth diapers are expensive and they require more effort to use. Disposable diapers are convenient and cheap but in the long run, the expenses add up. They say babies who use cloth diapers are less likely to have diaper rash. Both are perfectly viable options.

Why don't you get some cloth diapers as an investment (if you have the budget and time for them and if you want to) but still use disposable diapers when you want/need to?

Yeah, I know that there is absolutely no substitute for breastmilk. But don't judge women who formula feed all too easily or make them feel like they're committing a feeding crime.

I read this article at a time when I needed it most. One of the captions read, “My dear fellow queens, breastfeeding is good for our babies but it is not the be-all and end-all of motherhood. Please, please know that our mental health is as important as our babies' physical well-being.”

The night before I snapped and cried again because you wouldn’t latch onto me and I felt that my milk supply would dry out before we could even begin to enjoy the joys of feeding. That night, we decided to finally use the feeding bottles NinangE sent us from the U.S. and stop dropper-feeding you. Right then and there, you father ordered the breast pump and nipple shield we needed.

Milk drunk. We just want you to know that we're giving you the "best" of both breasts, este world.

These past few days, we have both started to enjoy the perks of feeding. I pump breast milk for you and we feed it to you using a bottle. We also supplement with formula milk while I’m still working on building my supply. The goal is not to give you just breast milk. The goal is to continue giving you breast milk for as long as I can while topping up with formula milk until we no longer need the latter.

I have become a strong advocate for mixed feeding, a style, I think, that many mothers are either ashamed to admit or don’t know at all. I think the pressure to breastfeed has led many mothers, especially first-time ones, to believe that if they can’t produce the milk their baby needs on Day 1, they can’t do anything about it anymore and that they should start feeding formula milk, and when they do, they are total failures.

This is just utterly wrong. Don’t we all want the best for our babies? I think there’s an urgent need for stronger support for women who formula feed but still want to give breastmilk for as long as they can.

If there are mixed breastfeeding groups, let's talk, sagot ko na ang printing ng brochures ninyo.

XOXO,

Update (as of March 29, 2018): Changed my codename from Queen Bitch (QB) to Tiger Mom (TM).

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Dear Peanut,

I heard about the Unang Yakap program from my “mommy friends.” Your UncleP also told me about it and as a writer, I’ve researched about it to great extent.

We’re glad to know that the hospital we chose is a strong advocate of the Unang Yakap program and breastfeeding. It’s good to know that we would give birth in a “baby-friendly” hospital.

What’s great about The Medical City is that they offer these free prenatal and parenting seminars for both their patients and outsiders. One of the seminars we attended included a hospital tour of the pre-labor room, labor room, delivery room, ward, and private rooms (and even the NICU). So we were able to—somehow—simulate what we would do when labor pain finally starts. A dry run of some sort. Looking back, that tour really helped!

And just as they promised in the seminars, you were immediately brought to my chest and taught how to direct latch in the delivery room while the doctors stitched me up. But you didn’t want to latch on even after several tries. You kept on crying and I thought that maybe the traumatic birth experience (you ate some of your poop while still inside my tummy, thus the stat CS) stressed you out. Maybe you just needed some time to relax.

When you were finally roomed-in with me, we immediately started to try direct latching so we can exclusively breastfeed. Nurses, doctors, and lactation consultants, even the midwives, continuously try to teach me how to properly position you so you can latch on properly. Sometimes, it worked. Most of the time, it didn’t. You would latch on for a while, suck—maybe 4 to 5 sucks per latch—, unlatch, and then cry. And we would start over again.

I wasn’t worried because we already know that it’s okay not to feed you for quite some time immediately following birth—because you still have some “baon” nutrients that you received from me before they cut your umbilical cord.

The prenatal seminars also educated us about the size of your tummy on Day 1 (the size of a calamansi fruit) so we weren’t worried that I couldn’t provide colostrum by the ounce. Of course, your grandparents were worried that you were getting hungry as hell.

We kept trying the direct latching and exclusive breastfeeding combo but the same thing happens. I try hand expression and I can see yellowish milk coming out. You just couldn’t latch on properly because my nipples are too small (not inverted, not flat, but they’re small).

If my areolas are the size of China (as your father wrote), I could probably describe my nipples as the Taal Volcano in Tagaytay because they’re not protruded enough that you can latch on effectively.

Taal Volcano in Tagaytay

I distinctly remember our third night at the hospital. We were trying to breastfeed you every 2-3 hours but you seemed so irritated already. Perhaps because since you couldn’t latch on properly, you also couldn’t get the colostrum out.

That was also the night that we were trying to calm you down so you would get the maximum exposure under the phototherapy equipment. I remember holding your tiny, yellowish face with one hand (football hold) and you said “ahh!” In my head, I keep on replaying that moment. I don’t know why but I swear I can still hear you utter “ahh!” sometimes as if someone nudged you awake. I remember how tiny you were on Day 3, like Turmeric Chicken, thigh part.

The Medela Pump Drama

When we finally agreed to take you to NICU for phototherapy, they told me I can breastfeed every 2-3 hours. But I wasn’t confident that I could provide you 20 ml of breast milk per feeding. I kept telling everyone that my nipples weren’t protruded enough that you couldn’t latch on properly but all they said was that I keep trying the direct latch approach.

Since they ran out of donor breastmilk that week (because umulan nga ng premature babies, as one of the midwives said) and we knew that getting breastmilk from friends or FB groups could take a while, we agreed to give you formula milk as a supplement. They had us sign a consent form as part of a hospital protocol.

Your father and I grew up on formula milk—the best money can buy at that time. And we turned out okay (walang kokontra, hahahaha) and we’re healthy. So we really have no qualms about giving you formula milk. After all, science bitches! Pun intended, you’ll know what I mean if you watch Breaking Bad.

We told ourselves, so what? We can still try to breastfeed you when we get home. But breastfeeding hardcore groups would rally and say, “Oh no, you ruined your chances of exclusively breastfeeding!” They would say “Oh no, nipple confusion na yan for sure kasi nagbote ka na!”

BACK OFF!

If formula milk is the best option for my child at a specific time, no poster, no video, no counseling would stop me from giving my baby what he needs.

NICU has breast pumps available so I figured, I might as try the machine so I can test one before we buy. Since we psyched ourselves that we're doing direct latching, we didn’t buy any pump prior to giving birth.

When I first visited NICU, I tried to do direct latching but you caused a ruckus at the breastfeeding room that I felt the 3 women there, who were silently breastfeeding, were judging me or feeling sorry for me because of your dynamite wails. It came to a point that I cried because you keep refusing my gigantic breasts.

Anak, ang laki ng dede ng nanay mo. Like three times the size of your tiny, tiny head. Each jug is filled with colostrum and you couldn’t get it out. Sino ba naman ang hindi maiiyak? Liquid gold kaya yun!

When I told the nurse that I’ll just try to pump milk instead, she wheeled you back to the phototherapy room and I swear, you gave me the evilest side eye I’ve ever seen as you exited the room. It felt to me like you were saying, “How could you leave me alone at this fancy tanning salon, mother???”

So there I was, inside the breastfeeding room at NICU, strapped to a Medela automatic breast pump. The three women were all holding their babies, skin to skin, and I was holding a yellow Medela breast pump bottle crying silently.

I felt so guilty and so sorry and so disappointed in myself because I couldn’t provide breast milk for you. After 1 hour of automated pumping, I could only get a few drops of colostrum out. The NICU nurse said it was okay and they would feed it to you. Liquid gold, as they say.

One of the OB-GYN speakers at the prenatal seminars attended warned us about this possible scenario. He said we should refrain from asking ourselves, “Anong klase akong ina?!” when we encounter such situations.

But that was exactly what I kept asking myself as I held the Medela breast pump bottle close to my jugs and cried silently while the three women nursed their premature babies, just like in those breast is best posters you see around the malls, hospitals, and almost everywhere!

Before I left the NICU breastfeeding room, I found out that they were all having issues, except for one. One told me her premature daughter won’t latch on and she had been there for 2 hours already! Another, mother of twins, told me she asked for donor’s milk because she couldn’t provide for both and that one of the NICU nurses feed her baby with a dropper. The one (without the issue) said comforting words that it will get better.

I realized that, wow, at the surface, I thought they were all having a wonderful time breastfeeding—complete with rainbows, butterflies, and unicorns. But in reality, they also have latching problems, breast milk supply issues, and more. So you see, everyone has an issue with breastfeeding.

Which leads me to another advocacy I would support with all my being.

To be continued…

XOXO,

Update (as of March 29, 2018): Changed my codename from Queen Bitch (QB) to Tiger Mom (TM).

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Dear Peanut,

If you ask your father for a list of things (and people) that I dislike / hate / abhor, he would probably email you an Excel sheet—all nicely labeled, color-coded, and with very detailed information.

And that Excel sheet would probably have many versions (v1, v2, v3, etc.) because the list keeps on getting updated.

Before we gave birth to you, your Lola Mommy advised me to let go of some of the things (and people) that weigh me down. Apart from the fact that keeping a mental hate list is not really conducive to pregnancy, I should start with a “clean slate” and clear my plate of all negative things (and people).

And that’s what I did. And you know what, even if I didn’t destroy that list in my head, becoming a mother—especially a first-time mom—does a lot of good. I get so busy that I don’t have time to get irritated by small things (and small people) anymore.

But there’s one thing that recently got my ire and it’s this—how the strong focus on exclusive breastfeeding has become a new venue to bully mothers who don’t. Let me tell you how my incessant irritability started and a little backstory.

Hang in there, this one’s a bit long and bloody dramatic.

Pre-Peanut Days

Both your grandmothers did not breastfeed but we all know the many benefits of mother’s milk for babies. Who wouldn’t? I mean, you’d see the list EVERYWHERE.

There are so many groups nowadays that offer support for exclusively breastfeeding mothers and they’re all doing great jobs. I salute them, seriously.

What a time to be alive because back then (like in the 1980s or earlier), if you breastfeed your baby, it means you don’t have money to buy formula milk. Back then, people have this [wrong] notion that parents who breastfeed are poor that’s why they do it (because, well, breasts are just there and they’re free).

That all changed when later studies proved (and continuously) prove the physical, emotional, mental, and financial benefits of exclusive breastfeeding.

And we honestly believe in exclusive breastfeeding and direct latching. That’s why we didn’t buy a breast pump or bottles because we wanted (and we still want to) take advantage of my work-from-anywhere setup. Since I can work anywhere as long as I have my laptop and Wi-Fi connection, when you cry, I can simply pop a boob and you can feed anytime.

We attended as many prenatal seminars that we can. Hoarded as many freebies as we can (free diapers are the shiznit!). And basically psyched ourselves that we’ll exclusively breastfeed you for as long as we can and save big money in the long run.

But just like how our birth plan went the opposite direction, our feeding plan didn’t go as planned.

To be continued…

XOXO,

Update (as of March 29, 2018): Changed my codename from Queen Bitch (QB) to Tiger Mom (TM).